Me (lip) singing Because of You - Kelly Clarkson

Got nothing to do on a lazy Sunday afternoon so i decided to make a music video - through lip synching! I found it so hilarious so i decided to put it on youtube. I was laughing so hard seeing this on youtube because i could not imagine it there!

But anyways, here's Because of You by Kelly Clarkson, one of my favorite singers, ever!

Some Erap funny jokes

It's actually not yet officially over since there's still 3 days left until the counting of my "mock election"  but i had to end it here -- the first ever poll question on my blog, the presidential election. So, to give you the insight on what had happened during the "election", i included on the list the seven most prominent candidates for presidency. First off, we have

• Benigno Simeon "Noynoy" Cojuangco Aquino III- 20%
• Manuel "Manny" Bamba Villar, Jr. - 0%
• Jose Marcelo Ejercito - 40%
• Gilberto Eduardo Gerardo "Gilbert"/"Gibo" Cojuangco Teodoro, Jr. - 0%
•  Richard "Dick" Gordon - 20%
• Eduardo C. Villanueva - 20%
• Maria Ana Consuelo Madrigal-Valade - 0

Based on my survey (the number of participants withheld), the voters, who visited my site,  chose for Jose Marcelo Ejercito or Erap Estrada as their ideal president to be elected this coming May 2010 elections.
So, what's with Erap that mostly of my readers chose him? Since, i haven't featured him  yet on his "funny side", putting this entry on my blog will be the best idea to feature him - both on his best and funny side.

It may be unfair for the other presidential candidates not to feature their best sides but i have to warn you that Erap won our poll and i promised myself to feature the candidate's good side, whoever wins the poll.

Little did we know (probably most of us), that Erap's inauguration was featured on a 2000 peso bank note. I was searching something good about him but i found this much interesting. 

So much for the good side, though, let's proceed to the main event! I dont have much of Estrada's funny images but i have here what he was and is famous for - his diction. I have some listed here from some different websites and hope you like it. Take a read.

Erap was at a black tie party along with Reli German who supplied him with a constant flow of Blue Label. All the gentlemen came in black jackets, white shirts and black ties and the ladies in black gowns.

Erap thought it was a boring party so he kept drinking his Blue Label to get him through the night. Then he saw a lady in a white gown. "Reli, that's the lady I like," Erap said. "She is a non-conformist and a rebel. I think I will ask her to dance." "Madam, would you care to dance with the President of the Republic?" Erap asked.

The lady replied, "No, and I will give you 3 reasons why. Reason No. 1, I don't know how to dance." "That's a legitimate reason," Erap remarked.

"Reason No. 2, you are drunk," the lady continued. "That's your opinion," Erap said.

"Reason No. 3, I am Cardinal Sin."

 Here's another one:

ERAP: LOI WHILE LABORING.
Erap phoned a doctor, asking for assistance. Erap: Doc, what will I do? Loi is laboring and she’s in pain. Doctor: Is this her first baby? Erap: No, this is Erap.

And another:

"Use fish and pepper in a sentence," utos ng guro ni Erap noong ito'y estudyante pa lang.

"May I borrow a fish of pepper?" sagot ni Erap.

Nagpunta si Erap sa England at nag-meet sila ng prime minister. Habang kumakain, nagtanong ang prime minister.

"Is San Juanico Bridge the longest bridge in the Philippines?"

"Yes," mabilis na sagot ni Erap saka biglang nag-isip ng maitatanong din…

"Ah...Is London Bridge falling down?" 

Nanood ng three act play sina Erap at Loi sa Cultural Center. Pagkatapos ibaba ang telon nang matapos ang act I, nagyayaya na si Erap. "Tara na."

"Teka, intermission pa lang," sagot ni Loi.

"Hindi mo ba nabasa ang program?" tanong ni Erap sabay pakita ng program sa asawa. "Nakasulat * Act II Three Weeks Later. O, maghihintay ka pa?"

infested with the jejemons

Yesterday, as I went to a drugstore to buy something, I heard the DJ's on the radio talking about a certain topic. They seemed to be very happy about it (you could tell because of their boisterous laughter, especially the female DJ) and that made me stop and listen to what they were discussing. 

On  that certain point, while waiting for one of them to say their topic, i suddenly remember the jejemons. How they became so instantly famous! As i had the nasty thought of them, my consciousness went back to the radio as the female DJ laughed so hard and said "...so that's what the jejemons are!". I said to myself, "Wow! Didn't know they we're talking about them, too!"

If ever i was alone on that drugstore, i would laugh to death also about what i heard.

But anyways, this is the reason why i made this entry. I have an image here of the supposedly WIKIPEDIA website for the word "jejemons". But look what happened.

I tried to find out on WIKIPEDIA what "jejemon" really means but to my disappointment, i found it deleted! But anyhow, i didn't stop myself from looking the real meaning of that word -- what it really means from the linguist's point of view - a lexicographer, probably. 

I remember my friend, John Paul on Facebook tagged me something about what a "jejemon" means. I checked my FB once again and there! I found the website he sent me. It's called URBANDICTIONARY.COM. So, instead of giving you the long definition of this nonsense term, i'll give you the distinct characteristics of the jejemonsters.

1. usually seen around networking sites such as Friendster and Multiply (Multiply? but why?)
2. individuals with low IQ (hmm, probably...)
3. trying-hard Filipino gangsters and emos
4. they can not express themselves in the English language as good as an average person  
5. they put too much letters and symbols in every word they say even in their god damn NAMES or ALIASES.
6. a person WhO tyPeZ lYKeS tH1s pfOuh.. whether you are RICH, MIDDLE CLASS or POOR ifpK eU tYpE L1K3 tHiS pfOuh..eU are CONSIDERED AS JEJEMON

 Anyways, if you'd like to see and ATLEAST check the website, you can  go here: urbandictionary.com

That will lead you to the site.

So much for that characteristic-thing of the jejemons. Let's tickle our funny bones by one of  their comrades' suicide note. Take a look.

Now, you tell me if you'd like to finish to read this suicide note. (I might take a suicide also if i did.)

n.b.

jejemons are usually hated or hunted down by Jejebusters or the grammar nazi to eradicate their grammatical ways.

FILIPINO FUNNY MOMENTS

Here are some of the first installments of some FILIPINO FUNNY MOMENTS taken from a website Kwelang Pinoy (blog.kwelangpinoy.com).

After reading these "moments" made me laugh and reminisce at the scenes. Such a great way to tickle our funny bones with this laughable item. More to come! 

--------------------------------------------------------

1. Nadia Montenegro promoting the movie, The Life Story of Julie Vega:
“I would like to invite everybody to watch the Life Story of Julie Vega. Kung nasaan man si Julie ngayon, I’m sure she’s very happy ‘coz it’s just around the corner.”

2. Melanie Marquez’s parting shot to Mrs. Dee, her former mother-in-law:
“You know, I’ll say this in English because Mrs. Dee doesn’t understand Tagalog. Mrs. Dee.. ang labo mo!”

3. Melanie Marquez accepting an award:
“Thank you very much. Ito na ang pinakamasayang pasko at manigong bagong taon sa inyong lahat.”

4. Melanie Marquez accepting another award:
“I want to thank my mother, my father and my parents.”

5. Melanie Marquez complementing Nikki Valdez backstage on her dance moves:
“Nikki, you’re so galing. You should go to the States. You will sell hotcakes!”

6. Melanie Marquez on Joey Marquez:
“Don’t judge my brother; he’s not a book!”

7. Melanie Marquez on her father:
“Ang tatay ko lang ang only living legend na buhay!”

8. Melanie Marquez feeling relieved:
“My answers have been prayered.”

9. An indignant Melanie Marquez:
“I won’t stoop down to my level!”

10. In the Mata ng Bayan portion of her show, Inday Badiday asks the usual questions to an abandoned street kid:
Inday: Kilala mo ba ako? (Do you know who I am?)
Street kid: Opo (Yes, maam)
Inday: Sino ako? (Who am I?)
Street kid: Bakla. (A homo).

11. On her new year’s eve show, Inday Badiday quizzes Madame Auring, fortune teller and walking plastic surgery disaster:
Inday: Ano ang iyong prediction kay Stella Suarez? (What is your prediction for Stella Suarez?)
Madame Auring: Lalo siyang sisikat sa darating na taon at malalampasan pa niya ang kasikatan ni Alma Moreno. (She’ll be more famous in the coming year and she’ll surpass the fame of Alma Moreno).
The following day’s headline: Stella Suarez Commits Suicide!

12. Towards the end of Kris Aquino’s interview with Jessa Zaragosa:
Kris: Describe Dingdong (Jessa’s husband) in three words.
Jessa: Actually, one word lang: My life.

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melanie marquez' famous quotes!

I've found this quotes of Melanie Marquez on a certain website and got really tickled. After making some researches, I've found out that Melanie, indeed, made her book. Her book of malapropism! I couldn't really help myself from laughing out loud! just imagine on how she does and talks it!  Here's some of the famous quotes of our beloved Miss International!

-------------------------------------oooooooooooo---------------------------------------

“That’s why I’m a success, it’s because I don’t middle in other people’s lives.”

                                             ooooooooooo

 “Don’t judge my brother;  he’s not a book.”

                                                                      ooooooooooo

“I won’t stoop down to my level.”

                                                    ooooooooooo 

“Hello? Bulag ka ba? Bingi ka ba? Are you dep?”

                                                     ooooooooooo

“Yung STD, baka sa maruming toilet lang niya nakuha yan.”

                                                    ooooooooooo

“Eh, ikaw ba naman, durugin ang ari mo! Pag di ka naman manutok ng baril.”

                                                    ooooooooooo

“We are lovers, not fighters.”

                                                    ooooooooooo

“Kapatid ko pa rin siya. We are one and the same.”

                                                    ooooooooooo

“I don’t eat meat. I’m not a carnival.”

                                                    ooooooooooo

“Eto na po ang pinakamaligayang pasko at manigong taon sa inyong lahat.” (During her acceptance speech at a Metro Filmfest awards night where her bioflick, directed by her late father Temyong Marquez, won an award.)

                                                                     ooooooooooo

“Sumasakit ang migraine ko.”

                                                       ooooooooooo

“Ang tatay ko ang only living legend na buhay!”

                                                      ooooooooooo

“Period na talaga; wala nang exclamation point.” (When asked on S-Files if her present husband, Adam Lawyer, is her Mr. Right .).

                                                      ooooooooooo

“Oo nga”, said Melanie,”pero I-English-in ko para maintindihan niya.” Then Melanie looked into the camera and, with the peremptoriness of royalty, she said, “And to you, Mrs Dee, I have two words for you. Ang labo mo!”.

                                                       ooooooooooo

“Dont worry little angel, big angel is here”.

                                                       ooooooooooo

“He should be put behind bar”. You can fool me once, you can fool me twice, you can fool me thrice, but you can never fool me four”.

                                                             ooooooooooo

“Nikki, you’re so galing. You should go to the states. You will sell hotcakes”.

                                                                ooooooooooo

“They should talk behind the scene… (on Kris and Joey)

                                                            ooooooooooo

“Hindi ba kayo naawa sa kapatid ko… sa mga kwento nya? Di ba kayo na-PERSUAVE ng mga kwento niya? Hindi si Joey ang tipong mambubugbog ng babae… talaga lang malapit siya sa mga gulo… PRO-ACCIDENT kasi siya eh.”

Boy Abunda: O melanie, paano na ang showbiz career mo ngayong magmo-Mormon ka na?
Melanie: Ah okay lang ‘yon Boy, kasi matagal na rin akong SEMI-RETARDED.

                                                            ooooooooooo

“A man’s success is a woman’s behind.”

                                                           ooooooooooo

“My husband was born on a silver spoon”

                                                              ooooooooooo

Ate Luds: Paano ka nag-susurvive sa mga trials mo?
Melanie: Alam mo Ate Ludz, you know, when you are alone, you really have to istep your foot…ah, forward!

                                                            ooooooooooo

“It’s not my problem anymore. It’s their problem anymore.”

Melanie Marquez was accosted by a certain guy from a certain TV network. He shouted, “Hey *****,” upon which Melanie turned around and retorted, “Don’t you ever, ever call me…hey!”

                                                            ooooooooooo

“I keep my crown in the voltage.”

                                                             ooooooooooo

“Well, I want to spend my holidays with my family most probably out of place. ”

                                                              ooooooooooo

“Please watch HIRAM starring Aleck Baldwin (referring to Aleck Bovick) and myself. It’s DIRECTOR by Romy Suzara.” ( While she was in Morning Girls With Kris and Korina)

                                                                  ooooooooooo

“My answers have been prayered.” (After giving birth, and an interview on The Buzz )

                                                              ooooooooooo

“Hello…Huwag kang tumahol sa sarili mong bakuran noh! You know, huwag kang tumahol like dogs.” (On ex-flame Lito Lapid, in response to being misunderstood )

                                                              ooooooooooo

Some FUNNY Filipino Signs

I wanted waitress (Bring the bio deta)

Entrance only Do not Enter 

Dont Enter Your Slipper

Rules to be Follows

our guest pls do not inter