Some Erap funny jokes

It's actually not yet officially over since there's still 3 days left until the counting of my "mock election"  but i had to end it here -- the first ever poll question on my blog, the presidential election. So, to give you the insight on what had happened during the "election", i included on the list the seven most prominent candidates for presidency. First off, we have

• Benigno Simeon "Noynoy" Cojuangco Aquino III- 20%
• Manuel "Manny" Bamba Villar, Jr. - 0%
• Jose Marcelo Ejercito - 40%
• Gilberto Eduardo Gerardo "Gilbert"/"Gibo" Cojuangco Teodoro, Jr. - 0%
•  Richard "Dick" Gordon - 20%
• Eduardo C. Villanueva - 20%
• Maria Ana Consuelo Madrigal-Valade - 0

Based on my survey (the number of participants withheld), the voters, who visited my site,  chose for Jose Marcelo Ejercito or Erap Estrada as their ideal president to be elected this coming May 2010 elections.
So, what's with Erap that mostly of my readers chose him? Since, i haven't featured him  yet on his "funny side", putting this entry on my blog will be the best idea to feature him - both on his best and funny side.

It may be unfair for the other presidential candidates not to feature their best sides but i have to warn you that Erap won our poll and i promised myself to feature the candidate's good side, whoever wins the poll.

Little did we know (probably most of us), that Erap's inauguration was featured on a 2000 peso bank note. I was searching something good about him but i found this much interesting. 

So much for the good side, though, let's proceed to the main event! I dont have much of Estrada's funny images but i have here what he was and is famous for - his diction. I have some listed here from some different websites and hope you like it. Take a read.

Erap was at a black tie party along with Reli German who supplied him with a constant flow of Blue Label. All the gentlemen came in black jackets, white shirts and black ties and the ladies in black gowns.

Erap thought it was a boring party so he kept drinking his Blue Label to get him through the night. Then he saw a lady in a white gown. "Reli, that's the lady I like," Erap said. "She is a non-conformist and a rebel. I think I will ask her to dance." "Madam, would you care to dance with the President of the Republic?" Erap asked.

The lady replied, "No, and I will give you 3 reasons why. Reason No. 1, I don't know how to dance." "That's a legitimate reason," Erap remarked.

"Reason No. 2, you are drunk," the lady continued. "That's your opinion," Erap said.

"Reason No. 3, I am Cardinal Sin."

 Here's another one:

ERAP: LOI WHILE LABORING.
Erap phoned a doctor, asking for assistance. Erap: Doc, what will I do? Loi is laboring and she’s in pain. Doctor: Is this her first baby? Erap: No, this is Erap.

And another:

"Use fish and pepper in a sentence," utos ng guro ni Erap noong ito'y estudyante pa lang.

"May I borrow a fish of pepper?" sagot ni Erap.

Nagpunta si Erap sa England at nag-meet sila ng prime minister. Habang kumakain, nagtanong ang prime minister.

"Is San Juanico Bridge the longest bridge in the Philippines?"

"Yes," mabilis na sagot ni Erap saka biglang nag-isip ng maitatanong din…

"Ah...Is London Bridge falling down?" 

Nanood ng three act play sina Erap at Loi sa Cultural Center. Pagkatapos ibaba ang telon nang matapos ang act I, nagyayaya na si Erap. "Tara na."

"Teka, intermission pa lang," sagot ni Loi.

"Hindi mo ba nabasa ang program?" tanong ni Erap sabay pakita ng program sa asawa. "Nakasulat * Act II Three Weeks Later. O, maghihintay ka pa?"